Put Yourself in Someone Else’s Narrative

My calendar tells me it’s 2018 but as I look around I see society backpedaling and losing ground on important concepts I used to think were simple, like personhood and what it means to be a human being. Equality, empathy, acceptance, and even just tolerance are becoming lamentably scarce these days. When the world seems like it’s lost its way, I turn to books. Here are some new and forthcoming books on my TBR that offer different perspectives and keen insight into lives that are very different from my own.

#NotYourPrincess: Voices of Native American Women
I don’t know if you got the memo, but the real Pocahontas was nothing like Disney wanted us to believe. Different but united voices rise together in this collection of poetry, prose, and art created by Native women. Leave your preconceived notions–and stereotypes–at the door.

Americanized: Rebel Without a Green Card by Sara Saedi
Based on the author’s real diary entries, Americanized tells the story of a girl who discovered–at age 13–that she and her family were undocumented citizens. Her parents had fled Iran when Sara was two, and she didn’t uncover her family’s undocumented status until her sister wanted to apply for an after-school job but didn’t have a Social Security number. This book sounds like a good mix of seeing life in a new–and terrifying–way, all while struggling through the more typical adolescent changes and experiences.

Because I Was a Girl: True Stories for Girls of All Ages
Laid out in chronological order, this collection of stories by over thirty women is set up as a book to inspire young girls and teens to persevere in their own struggles. In these stories, the authors talk about barriers they’ve faced and how they overcame them to become successful. I’d also look at this collection as a book for people who don’t identify as female, or who may have forgotten what it’s like to be a teen, to read and gain some understanding as to what’s going on inside a teenage girl’s mind.

Getting Off: One Woman’s Journey Through Sex and Porn Addiction by Erica Garza
Society leads us to believe that sex addiction isn’t a real thing, and if it is, well it’s something that only affects men, right? Not true! And here to tell us about it in raw detail is Erica Garza. Early reviews mention it can be difficult to get through due to the subject matter and the raw emotions facing the author as she painfully recounts her journey from addiction to recovery. But for anyone wanting to understand a struggle that may be far outside their own world of experiences, this is the book to read.

The Last Girl: My Story of Captivity, and My Fight Against the Islamic State by Nadia Murad
“I want to be the last girl in the world with a story like mine.”
The Last Girl is a survivor’s memoir. Nadia tells her story and recounts how six of her brothers and her mother were killed and how she and thousands of other Yazidi girls were forced into the ISIS slave trade. A refugee, rape survivor, and incredibly strong woman, Nadia brings attention to the ongoing genocide in Iraq and forces us to come to the realization that individuals and families are torn apart by war every day; forced to become refugees in search of community who can never return home.

Love, Hate, and Other Filters by Samira Ahmed
I was fortunate enough to read an early copy of this book and I plan to write a full review in a future blog post. To whet your appetite: This is a completely compelling debut novel that exposes the prejudices in America and how difficult it can be to be a teenager struggling with growing up in a conservative, traditional household. Maya is living a small town life but has big city dreams. She struggles with pleasing her parents and pursuing her own goals and ideals for her future. And then a terrorist strikes, a terrorist with the same last name as Maya. Whether it’s choosing between two guys or dealing with a hate crime, the author does an outstanding job getting to the heart of the matter and exposing the raw emotions associated with each.

So You Want to Talk About Race by Ijeoma Oluo
These essays are being touted as an accessible take on the racial landscape in America. Topics include privilege, police brutality, intersectionality, microagressions, and the Black Lives Matter movement. Ijeoma’s writing is being compared to Roxane Gay and Ta-Nehisi Coates, two of my most favorite writers. The holds list is really growing quickly on this book, so be sure to get in the queue now.

This Will Be My Undoing: Living at the Intersection of Black, Female, and Feminist in (White) America by Morgan Jerkins
Morgan Jerkins is topping my list of most-anticipated authors I want to read this year. She’s also being compared to Roxane Gay, who wrote a glowing review of this book. Morgan writes about being young and Black in America. She tackles the important but tough topics of intersectional feminism and racism and I am so here for it.

To My Trans Sisters edited by Charlie Craggs
Exploring the diversity of the trans experience, this collection of letters by successful trans women from all walks of life and from all over the world offers advice to those transitioning or wanting to learn more about the different struggles trans women face. I’ve never had to endure life as someone other than I know I’m meant to be, so reading this will help me better understand the beauty and nuance of the personal struggles and successes of trans women.

When They Call You a Terrorist: a Black Lives Matter Memoir by Patrisse Khan-Cullors & asha bandele; foreword by Angela Davis
Learn more about the Black Lives Matter movement and get to know it from the inside. Patrisse is a co-founder of BLM and is an ardent speaker, artist, organizer, and freedom fighter. For those like me who want to learn more, and especially for anyone doubting the reason for even needing something like BLM, we all definitely need to hear and internalize what Patrisse passionately has to say.

I want and need to read books not aimed directly at me as the target audience, a straight white cis woman. These books definitely fit the bill. There’s also no way I can be as inclusive as I’d like with the limited space here, so please let me know in the comments of other books we can read to better understand each other. Let’s spend 2018 building empathy and compassion together.

This One’s For the Ladies

TacocatI always enjoy finding an exceptional new band or album, and my most recent discovery is Lost Time by Tacocat. Let us pause a moment to spell Tacocat backwards.

T-a-c-o-c-a-t.

If that’s not enough reason to like them, there’s also the music. Labelling themselves post post punk pop pop, classified by many as punk or pop punk, Tacocat delivers ice-cream-with-bubble-gum-sweet hard-edged pop in a bowl of witty lyrics and feminism (from a fun viewpoint). They are the Go-Go’s’ slightly naughty younger sister.

The Northwest has been a hotbed for feminist bands since the 90s. Olympia was the cradle of the riot grrrl explosion (hard-hitting punk with feminist lyrics), which featured bands like Bikini Kill, Heavens to Betsy and Bratmobile. The current crop of feminist bands (Chastity Belt, NighTraiN, La Luz, Mommy Long Legs and G.L.O.S.S. among others) don’t all play the same style of music, but their lyrical content and philosophical bent join them together in a musical movement that is poised to be the next big thing in our corner of the continent.

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Tacocat, the most popular of our NW feminist bands, came to some prominence in 2014 with the release of NVM, which includes Crimson Wave, a pop-surf song about menstruation.

Call my girls, see if they wanna go, take their minds off dumb aunt Flo
Sew a scarlet letter on my bathing suit, ‘cause I’ve got sharks in hot pursuit
Surfin’, surfin’ the wave

The album, whose title is a nod to Nirvana’s Nevermind, was critically acclaimed, even being named one of the top 10 CMJ college radio albums of 2014. Lost Time has not been as well-received but it’s still a highly enjoyable listening experience. The album’s title is an X-Files reference and the first song, Dana Katherine Scully, is a paean to Fox Mulder’s partner, a woman trying to get ahead in that men’s club known as the FBI: “… she’s the only one thinking it through …”.

Topics that the band tackles on Lost Time include menstruation, women having sex and men belittling women. FDP, the album’s second song, features lead singer Emily Nokes’ feelings on the first day of her period: “So tired, so spent / Functioning at ten percent”. A pregnancy scare is looked at in Plan A, Plan B when a woman considers using the morning-after pill as a contraceptive following a condom failure: “Had safe sex / Faulty latex”. Men Explain Things To Me is a woman’s response to mansplaining: “We get it dude / We’ve already heard enough from you / The turning point is overdue”.

But not everything is feminism. I Love Seattle takes a look at the earthquake that will destroy the Northwest coast and the lack of concern that accompanies it:

Ooooh, beautiful Seattle
Ah, fall into the sea
Earthquake, tsunami
There’s still no place I’d rather be

And other songs are simply about day to day life, its joys and pitfalls. Night Swimming contains an obscurely funny lyric: “You can bring a boom box / But you can’t play R.E.M.”. I enjoy this line simply because I don’t care for R.E.M.’s music. But dig even deeper and you’ll find that R.E.M. also has a song called Nightswimming. Excellent arcane reference.

Be sure to check out Lost Time, and if you want to look further into feminist music from the Northwest, try Sleater-Kinney, Childbirth and THEESatisfaction.

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Talking to Strangers (About Books) Part 2

Greetings, intrepid readers! In my last post I talked about all the amazing things happening for bookworms on social media. I highlighted three different platforms (Goodreads, Instagram, and Litsy) and detailed the top 5 types of conversations you’re likely to have among fellow readers on those apps. Today I’m going to review some of the stellar books I’ve read as a result of these conversations with strangers. All of these books were outside of my typical fluffy/frivolous reading repertoire and I never would have picked them up had I not seen in-depth reviews and quotes from readers on bookish social media. I should add these are listed in the order I read them. And some of these were partially reviewed in my post last month about the 24 in 48 Readathon.

rupi kaur milk and honey by carol on litsy
Milk & Honey by Rupi Kaur
It seemed like everyone who hadn’t read this book when it came out late last year was picking it up for the first time in April for National Poetry Month. I typically don’t read much poetry but I made an exception for this title. In her first book of poetry, Rupi Kaur takes us deep into her life with extremely personal poems about her childhood, past boyfriends, and learning to heal after trauma and breakups. It’s a quick read, but one that is extremely frank and open about what she’s gone through in her life. Even with all of the personal details, most women will find themselves somewhere in this book. I do love how it ends on an uplifting note, as if to say this too shall pass and I am stronger now for having gone through all of this. I also like the “everywoman” appeal of the poems as they invite each woman to look back on her relationships, her period, how she got through extremely trying times and came through stronger, though hurting.

lindy west shrill by carol on litsy
Shrill: Notes From a Loud Woman by Lindy West
I am apparently the only person who had not heard of Lindy West before this book, and even so I got to it too late to see her at a reading in Seattle as she was traveling around the country on her book tour this spring. I regret not having her on my radar until now, but I have been forever changed by reading her book Shrill. Not only does Lindy tackle major topics like feminism, abortion, and rape culture, she is the number one poster child for squashing fat-shaming and having positive body acceptance. During her book I found myself questioning my own attitude towards my body, and asking myself why I let others’ opinions of what they think I should wear and what they think is appropriate or not for my body type affect what I purchase and what I wear. The day after finishing Shrill I wore a dressy pair of shorts to work. People saw my knees and I didn’t die!

roxane gay bad feminist by carol on litsy
Bad Feminist by Roxane Gay
Reading Roxane Gay is a lot like talking with your most level-headed friend. Even if the subject matter is one that evokes strong feelings, she keeps her cool and tries to discuss these important things with you in a calm, clear manner. In Bad Feminist Roxane Gay manages to cover everything from pop culture to rape to feminism to a career in academia. She doesn’t talk down to us, but rather goes out of her way to lay out the inequalities, the injustices, the annoyances, and the facts in a matter-of-fact and yet empathetic way. There is a definite juxtaposition of mixing very serious topics with lighter ones. I was extremely fascinated reading about her time as a competitive Scrabble player. First of all, I didn’t even know that such a thing existed. But I realize that to do anything competitively there is a suggestion that your skills stand above the average person. To play Scrabble competitively implies an intellect and strength of character that few posses. Such is the case with Roxane Gay. She is smart. She is funny. She is working on a book called Hunger that I can’t wait to get my hands on, and I get the feeling I will always react with grabby hands when someone mentions a new release by her.

claudia rankine citzen an american lyric by carol on litsy
Citizen: an American Lyric by Claudia Rankine
Every time something horrible, unjust, and tragic happens in this world, the bookish social media clusters swarm together in shared empathy, seeking understanding  to try and make sense of the senseless. Such was the case with Citizen. I want to live in a world where this book isn’t necessary–but the sad and disgusting truth is this book is very much-needed. There are many put-yourself-in-this-situation passages that are written in the second person. The use of the second person is clever and intentional in a book that tries to expose life in a racist country. Because as much as we would like to think we have evolved past racism, bigotry, and inequality, we have not. As a country, we still have so far to go it’s heartbreaking. But that’s why books like this are here for you, and why I recommend everyone read it. Everyone. Bookish social media declared this required reading for every American citizen and I wholeheartedly agree.

rebecca solnit men explain things to me by carol on litsy
Men Explain Things to Me by Rebecca Solnit
Once again my bookish social media connections raved about a book, calling it necessary reading, and once again I picked up the gauntlet. And while this book isn’t just about mansplaining–a term the author has mixed feelings about–it definitely is about the disenfranchised and the cultural missteps that need to be corrected if we are ever going to improve our communities.The passages that really stood out to me involved having a voice and being heard. Historically it has been disgustingly easy for the group in power to silence anyone else whose opinions, thoughts, feelings, or civil liberties would infringe upon the leading group’s power. But the more that people band together to share one voice–civil rights, women’s suffrage, feminism, exposing racism in one’s community–the harder it is to ignore the message.

These relatively short books packed a mighty literary punch. While I wouldn’t have sought them out on my own, I am so glad my bookish comrades urged me on. Not only was I reading out of my fluffy comfort zone, I was seeing the world through some very different perspectives. You’ll notice these books were strong on themes of racism and sexism, feminist to the core. I’m currently falling down a rabbit hole of such, with book recommendations based on these books spiraling out from my TBR pile.

More books that bookish social media has recommended to me that deal with race and racism include Homegoing by Yaa Gyasi, Between the World and Me by Ta-Nehisi Coates, and Freedom is a Constant Struggle: Ferguson, Palestine, and the Foundations of a Movement by Angela Davis.

More books that bookish social media has recommended to me that deal with sexism and feminism include Everyday Sexism by Laura Bates, Sex Object by Jessica Valenti, and He’s a Stud, She’s a Slug and 49 Other Double Standards Every Woman Should Know also by Jessica Valenti.

Hopefully you’ve not only gained some new titles to add to your TBR pile but also seen what good can come from social media. I’ve rarely encountered a troll on Goodreads, Litsy, or the #bookstagram portion of Instagram. It’s kind of like a book nerd’s utopia. We’re definitely living in the golden age of reading. Seize the day and your smartphone and join the reading revolution!

Ryan Gosling’s Imagined Thoughts

If you need to brush up on your feminist education and could also use a chuckle, a quick perusal of Feminist Ryan Gosling: Feminist Theory (As Imagined) From Your Favorite Sensitive Movie Dude by Danielle Henderson might be just the ticket. Henderson has a blog that features photos of actor Ryan Gosling imprinted with bits of feminist thoughts. And since they’re intended to look like Ryan Gosling is actually saying them, the statements always start with, “Hey girl.” For instance:

Hey girl. I know how Judith Butler feels about subverting the dominant paradigm and rejecting the naturalization of heteronormativity, but I got you this flower.

Sometimes the statement has a less-direct tie to feminist philosophy, but contains sentiments that most feminists would find themselves agreeing with, such as:

 

Hey girl. Does watching reality television only to point out the flawed, patriarchal undertones count as activism?

There have been several copy-cat blogs on varying interests both using Ryan Gosling as the focus and starting with, “Hey girl.” Librarian Hey Girl is my personal favorite. This site focuses on the library world, and the link was passed among library staff earlier this year. We all love working with all of you, but there are times when we just want to have a laugh, nod our heads, and say, “Yep. Only in the library!”

Back to Feminist Ryan Gosling! The Library of Congress has classified this book in the humor section (817.6) but I wouldn’t let that distract from your pursuit of a feminist education. Many people dream of a sensitive man (or woman) who will not only show an appreciation for their interests but genuinely agrees with them, too. So even though we don’t know exactly what Ryan Gosling’s views on feminism are, we can enjoy this fantasy just the same and simultaneously learn a bit more about what feminists have been working so hard on for so many, many years.

I thank everyone who speaks out for what they believe in. I also have to thank those who can put a humorous spin on it and bring it to the masses. Thank you, Danielle Henderson!

Carol