Loud Music as a Curative

According to 4 out of 5 doctors, isolation can be intensely mind-numbing. Particles called “brain plaque” break free from the grey matter and travel to the eustachian tubes where they lodge securely, literally numbing the brain! The only known remedy is listening to loud, aggressive music. Today’s featured cure? The Woods by Sleater-Kinney.

Emerging from the primordial mists of riot-grrrl-fueled rock and roll, Sleater-Kinney’s members had already shown a penchant (as the kids say) for the louder things in life. In 2005’s The Woods, the band brought a full frontal assault to their fans. And a cure for the isolation blues.

As soon as the needle hits the grooves, the album’s first track, The Fox, attempts to disconnect your medulla oblongata with a nod to classic rock. Titanic, intense (at times screamed) vocals, Moon-esque drums and a generally yuge sound conspire to cure your ills. The brain plaque begins to stir!

Lest we get overstimulated, song #2, Wilderness, starts delicately and grows into itself. The dizzying heights of The Fox are never reached, but a spectre of the late 60s remains with a wild and warped guitar solo (perhaps processed to sound backwards?) and intricate drums. The plaque regains its self-composure.

But tune #3, What’s Mine Is Yours, seals the deal with raw energy, aggressive vocals, psychedelic guitar and an absolutely wild drum solo. Now we see brain plaque on the run!

The remainder of the album features stark contrasts, powerful vocals, complex drum beats, impenetrable walls of sound, crunchiness and pastoral melodies until the final song, Night Light, permanently cures those isolation blues.

I know many of you are thinking, “Steve (which is not my name), how can I get ahold of this fine wax cylinder?” Firstly, let me tell you that certain cylinders have been turned into a series of numbers, or “digitized”, so that you can borrow them from your very own isolation cell. Simply go to the Hoopla app and look through the musical offerings. If you search for Sleater-Kinney you’ll discover that a goldurned plethora of titles are available for checkout.

So hop to it and clear away the brain plaque. In the immortal words of Mr. Guy Lomardo, “A one and-a two…”

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